Donald Trump steps out of the White House in the dead of winter. Right in front of him, on the White House lawn, he sees “Donald Trump Sucks” written in urine across the snow.
Well, he's pretty ticked off. He storms into his security staff’s HQ, and reads the security guys the riot act, while they stay silent and stare ashamedly at the floor.
Trump hollers “Well dammit, don’t just sit there! Get out and find out who did it! I want an answer, and I want it tonight!”
Later that evening, the chief security officer approaches Trump and says: “Well Mr. President, we have some bad news and we have some really bad news. Which do you want first?”
Trump says “Give me the bad news first.”
The officer says “Well, we took a sample of the urine and tested it. The results just came back, and it was Mike Pence’s urine.”
Trump says “Oh my, I feel so... so... betrayed! My own vice-president! Damn. ...well, what’s the really bad news?”
The officer replies “Well, it’s Melania’s handwriting.”

One should never do wrong in return, nor mistreat any man, no matter how one has been mistreated by him.”
- Socrates