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Author Topic: Burning your bridges  (Read 288 times)

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ken kenobie

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Burning your bridges
« on: December 21, 2018, 01:28:26 PM »

Getting older is starting to make me reminisce more and more . Sadly Ive come to realize that I made some mistake in life  , some mistakes were not that serious and I managed to rectify the problems , some mistakes were more life changing and once the decision was made then trying to put right the life changing action , is now just a far off impossible dream . In particular I’m talking about permanently moving to Thailand .

I followed many down the same path that led to my poor decision making , came to Thailand on holiday with mate , had such a jaw dropping good time and returned home in a state of shock. As a newly divorced man my humdrum life plodded on back home. But the memories of my past fantastic holiday to Thailand never left my thoughts .  I worked hard to build up my savings and plan a return trip to paradise .  Arriving back in Thailand as I made my way out of the air port I felt the same buzz that I had on my last holiday visit . Over the following years I met and fell in love with my now wife  , having to leaver her back in Thailand when I returned home was a heartbreaking situation . I did own my home in the UK , then out of the blue I was named as a beneficiary in a distant relatives last will and testament , by this time both my parents had past away after succumbing to the dreaded cancer. To cut this story short , I decided that Thailand was the place I wanted to live and I planned to get married . So I decided to sell my UK property and move permanently to Thailand . Fast forward , For many various reasons I now have a burning desire to return back to my country of birth . But I have no property to return to , my once healthy bank balance has been slowly eaten away and my state pension just about covers life’s basic necessities .

This quotation is like a thorn in my side ….  Burn Your Bridges . The saying means you should never make it impossible to return to somewhere or to someone because you may need to go back that way.


Has any one else gone and put a match to their bridges .



Ken





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Coolkorat

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Re: Burning your bridges
« Reply #1 on: December 21, 2018, 05:26:41 PM »

I'm not retired, don't live in Thailand and am not using savings (or pension) as my primary source of income. So I'm completely unqualified to comment. But some thoughts on your post:

- hundreds of thousands of Brits retire abroad each year. Until relatively recently Thailand was a great place to retire (and is only less great now because of difficult immigration and residency laws). I don't think you made a bad decision by any means.

- you don't mention children or grandchildren. With regards to the UK unless you had property in a blue-chip location and regret selling because of the increased value, or have children/ grandchildren you would like to see frequently, I am not sure I see the appeal of coming back. The big draw would be health: as RDRO said, he goes back to the US for 'proper' medical treatment where he (quite rightly) benefits from free treatment. In the UK treatment might be free, but the NHS is under strain and treatment is very dependent on location, age etc.

- If you had sold a villa in (for example) Spain to move to Thailand would you feel the same? Or would the negatives of living in Spain outweigh the benefits of living in Thailand?

- the devaluation of the pound vs. baht may be more of a factor than you think. Bear in mind GBP has devalued by close to 6% this year alone. £1000 is now only getting value at £940. In 5 years it has devalued by 22.3% - £1000 then is worth £777 now. A huge difference. Contrast this to the dollar over the same 5 year period: $1000 then is worth $998 now; almost the same. And this excludes the impact of inflation. The anecdotal 'halving' of the buying power of the £ is not as anecdotal as it seems.

- in the time you have been away, property and the cost of living has soared. Living costs are far greater than you might remember. For my family of four, our food costs per week top £140, and bear in mind we cook from scratch (not buying processed food), drink very very little and have no extravagant extras. Just living in the UK is expensive (and even more so in the US. My brother, who lives in upstate NY, is gobsmacked by the cost in the US).

I wouldn't presume to give advice, but in my limited opinion you are in the best place you could be. Better to improve the life you have (by adding value to your capital; your property and non-depreciating assets) than looking at a misty dream.
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ken kenobie

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Re: Burning your bridges
« Reply #2 on: December 21, 2018, 09:39:26 PM »

I'm not retired, don't live in Thailand and am not using savings (or pension) as my primary source of income. So I'm completely unqualified to comment. But some thoughts on your post:

- hundreds of thousands of Brits retire abroad each year. Until relatively recently Thailand was a great place to retire (and is only less great now because of difficult immigration and residency laws). I don't think you made a bad decision by any means.

- you don't mention children or grandchildren. With regards to the UK unless you had property in a blue-chip location and regret selling because of the increased value, or have children/ grandchildren you would like to see frequently, I am not sure I see the appeal of coming back. The big draw would be health: as RDRO said, he goes back to the US for 'proper' medical treatment where he (quite rightly) benefits from free treatment. In the UK treatment might be free, but the NHS is under strain and treatment is very dependent on location, age etc.

- If you had sold a villa in (for example) Spain to move to Thailand would you feel the same? Or would the negatives of living in Spain outweigh the benefits of living in Thailand?

- the devaluation of the pound vs. baht may be more of a factor than you think. Bear in mind GBP has devalued by close to 6% this year alone. £1000 is now only getting value at £940. In 5 years it has devalued by 22.3% - £1000 then is worth £777 now. A huge difference. Contrast this to the dollar over the same 5 year period: $1000 then is worth $998 now; almost the same. And this excludes the impact of inflation. The anecdotal 'halving' of the buying power of the £ is not as anecdotal as it seems.

- in the time you have been away, property and the cost of living has soared. Living costs are far greater than you might remember. For my family of four, our food costs per week top £140, and bear in mind we cook from scratch (not buying processed food), drink very very little and have no extravagant extras. Just living in the UK is expensive (and even more so in the US. My brother, who lives in upstate NY, is gobsmacked by the cost in the US).

I wouldn't presume to give advice, but in my limited opinion you are in the best place you could be. Better to improve the life you have (by adding value to your capital; your property and non-depreciating assets) than looking at a misty dream.

Thanks for taking the time to post your thoughts , I'm going to mull things over and post back .


Ken
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dereklev

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Re: Burning your bridges
« Reply #3 on: December 22, 2018, 03:39:34 AM »

I'm not retired, don't live in Thailand and am not using savings (or pension) as my primary source of income. So I'm completely unqualified to comment. But some thoughts on your post:

- hundreds of thousands of Brits retire abroad each year. Until relatively recently Thailand was a great place to retire (and is only less great now because of difficult immigration and residency laws). I don't think you made a bad decision by any means.

- you don't mention children or grandchildren. With regards to the UK unless you had property in a blue-chip location and regret selling because of the increased value, or have children/ grandchildren you would like to see frequently, I am not sure I see the appeal of coming back. The big draw would be health: as RDRO said, he goes back to the US for 'proper' medical treatment where he (quite rightly) benefits from free treatment. In the UK treatment might be free, but the NHS is under strain and treatment is very dependent on location, age etc.

- If you had sold a villa in (for example) Spain to move to Thailand would you feel the same? Or would the negatives of living in Spain outweigh the benefits of living in Thailand?

- the devaluation of the pound vs. baht may be more of a factor than you think. Bear in mind GBP has devalued by close to 6% this year alone. £1000 is now only getting value at £940. In 5 years it has devalued by 22.3% - £1000 then is worth £777 now. A huge difference. Contrast this to the dollar over the same 5 year period: $1000 then is worth $998 now; almost the same. And this excludes the impact of inflation. The anecdotal 'halving' of the buying power of the £ is not as anecdotal as it seems.

- in the time you have been away, property and the cost of living has soared. Living costs are far greater than you might remember. For my family of four, our food costs per week top £140, and bear in mind we cook from scratch (not buying processed food), drink very very little and have no extravagant extras. Just living in the UK is expensive (and even more so in the US. My brother, who lives in upstate NY, is gobsmacked by the cost in the US).

I wouldn't presume to give advice, but in my limited opinion you are in the best place you could be. Better to improve the life you have (by adding value to your capital; your property and non-depreciating assets) than looking at a misty dream.

If you are a British OAP and live in Thailand you also have the disadvantage of a frozen pension to put up with.

Our government treat our pension as a benefit.

It is not a benefit we paid for it all our working lives!!!
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ken kenobie

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Re: Burning your bridges
« Reply #4 on: December 22, 2018, 10:27:49 AM »

I'm not retired, don't live in Thailand and am not using savings (or pension) as my primary source of income. So I'm completely unqualified to comment. But some thoughts on your post:

- hundreds of thousands of Brits retire abroad each year. Until relatively recently Thailand was a great place to retire (and is only less great now because of difficult immigration and residency laws). I don't think you made a bad decision by any means.

- you don't mention children or grandchildren. With regards to the UK unless you had property in a blue-chip location and regret selling because of the increased value, or have children/ grandchildren you would like to see frequently, I am not sure I see the appeal of coming back. The big draw would be health: as RDRO said, he goes back to the US for 'proper' medical treatment where he (quite rightly) benefits from free treatment. In the UK treatment might be free, but the NHS is under strain and treatment is very dependent on location, age etc.

- If you had sold a villa in (for example) Spain to move to Thailand would you feel the same? Or would the negatives of living in Spain outweigh the benefits of living in Thailand?

- the devaluation of the pound vs. baht may be more of a factor than you think. Bear in mind GBP has devalued by close to 6% this year alone. £1000 is now only getting value at £940. In 5 years it has devalued by 22.3% - £1000 then is worth £777 now. A huge difference. Contrast this to the dollar over the same 5 year period: $1000 then is worth $998 now; almost the same. And this excludes the impact of inflation. The anecdotal 'halving' of the buying power of the £ is not as anecdotal as it seems.

- in the time you have been away, property and the cost of living has soared. Living costs are far greater than you might remember. For my family of four, our food costs per week top £140, and bear in mind we cook from scratch (not buying processed food), drink very very little and have no extravagant extras. Just living in the UK is expensive (and even more so in the US. My brother, who lives in upstate NY, is gobsmacked by the cost in the US).

I wouldn't presume to give advice, but in my limited opinion you are in the best place you could be. Better to improve the life you have (by adding value to your capital; your property and non-depreciating assets) than looking at a misty dream.

If you are a British OAP and live in Thailand you also have the disadvantage of a frozen pension to put up with.

Our government treat our pension as a benefit.

It is not a benefit we paid for it all our working lives!!!


Completely agree.

Ken
 


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Roger

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Re: Burning your bridges
« Reply #5 on: December 23, 2018, 05:56:03 AM »

Ken. I do understand where you are coming from, ''a burning desire to return to my country''. It might be crazy, but if one feels that way, that's that !

CK is right - there are so many good things about being in Thailand and the 'misty dream' re. back home has some harsh realities. (One inescapable advantage of 'home', is of course the healthcare).

You made me wonder if MY bridges are burnt - well I certainly couldn't return to the UK just as before, that's for sure. But I could get back one way or another   ::) 
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ken kenobie

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Re: Burning your bridges
« Reply #6 on: December 23, 2018, 08:41:53 AM »

Ken. I do understand where you are coming from, ''a burning desire to return to my country''. It might be crazy, but if one feels that way, that's that !

CK is right - there are so many good things about being in Thailand and the 'misty dream' re. back home has some harsh realities. (One inescapable advantage of 'home', is of course the healthcare).

You made me wonder if MY bridges are burnt - well I certainly couldn't return to the UK just as before, that's for sure. But I could get back one way or another   ::)

May be due to the prolonged time away from my once home , I’m dreaming about how things use to be . The subject of returning home
is one that I can’t not stop thinking about . :(


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caller

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Re: Burning your bridges
« Reply #7 on: December 23, 2018, 06:20:38 PM »

I’m dreaming about how things use to be . The subject of returning home is one that I can’t not stop thinking about . :(

In 2009, I moved to England from where I used to live - in London!  ;D Although that was as much to do with my work as opposed to where I actualy lived (I continued working in London).

At this moment in time, I am very content in living in Thailand, but I would have no worries about making the move back, should I need to, but not to London. I wonder how applicable Johnson's 'when a man is tired of London, he is tired on life' still is, with all the changes that have happened in London?
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ken kenobie

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Re: Burning your bridges
« Reply #8 on: December 23, 2018, 09:08:14 PM »

I’m dreaming about how things use to be . The subject of returning home is one that I can’t not stop thinking about . :(

In 2009, I moved to England from where I used to live - in London!  ;D Although that was as much to do with my work as opposed to where I actualy lived (I continued working in London).

At this moment in time, I am very content in living in Thailand, but I would have no worries about making the move back, should I need to, but not to London. I wonder how applicable Johnson's 'when a man is tired of London, he is tired on life' still is, with all the changes that have happened in London?

Ive only been to London twice , the first time to board the the Orient Express and the second time was a trip to Madame Tussauds  ::)


Ken
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caller

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Re: Burning your bridges
« Reply #9 on: December 23, 2018, 11:52:10 PM »

Ive only been to London twice , the first time to board the the Orient Express and the second time was a trip to Madame Tussauds  ::)

Ken

I can think of better reasons to visit London, although boarding the orient express sounds pretty good.
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ken kenobie

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Re: Burning your bridges
« Reply #10 on: December 28, 2018, 08:05:37 AM »

Ive only been to London twice , the first time to board the the Orient Express and the second time was a trip to Madame Tussauds  ::)

Ken

I can think of better reasons to visit London, although boarding the orient express sounds pretty good.


The OE was an interesting experience , these cufflinks are just a small memento .












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